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Old 06-20-2015, 04:30 AM   #1
themadscientist
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I desire a way to be less effective as a human, recommend an online game

Hello there. I'm an old dude who still has an Atari 2600, two Playstation 2s and a Playstation 4 that I played like three times. They are all in boxes likely never to come out again.

I freely admit, I mercilessly ridicule online gamers, but I think I'm only seeing the ones that have replaced their actual lives with virtual ones and that most people play them and just don't mention it whenever they can manufacture an opportunity to inject it into an unrelated conversation like a pothead who really wants to tell you about the economic uses of hemp.


When I think about, though, I spend a phenomenal time on forums and hours on Google looking up random crap and searching Tumblr for something more bizarre than what I have found thus far. Honestly, I could have been collecting gold coins, mining for things, shooting Nazis or doing the cybernasty with some hot elf who is actually a hairy plumber in New Jersey; cmon, it's a no brainer!



So, being a noob at these things, I figured I would ask around and see what games are out there and worth my time. I have a few criteria.

No FPS games with soldiers that look uncomfortably like real people I work with and for on the daily getting blown up. I find that stuff to be in very bad taste and while I would never deny it to someone else, it's most assuredly not my cup of joe.

I would prefer a free game. Hey, I'm a cheap bastard and my GT-R needs very expensive parts! I'm not spending real money to earn fake money if I don't have to. I did that once when I sold a gold coin for dollars and I didn't enjoy it.

I'm more into strategy and puzzles than fast-paced stuff. I screw around on the internet to relax after my regular RPG where I deal with morons and try to make it through a "stage" without choking one of them. "Quests" with the occasional mission would be very cool.

I'm not really interested in current time settings or even historical settings except maybe a sailing era type thing. I like boats.



I'm more escapist and would rather play something set in some fantasy world way back in the past or far into the future.

I'd like some realist graphics. Don't get me wrong, I watched a YouTube video of some guys playing Minecraft for the first time and I was laughing my ass off. It was more fun to watch them, though, than to try to play myself.

Any good games out there to play when not bothering you folks with my bone stock BRZ?
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Old 06-20-2015, 04:51 AM   #2
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Sounds like GTA online is up your alley (minus the current setting, in which case I'd recommend Elder Scrolls Online?). rob banks, buy million dollar cars and apartments along with killing hookers and throwing dump trucks around drift corners and jumping semi's over planes. really releases the workplace stress knowing i can go home and kill some hookers without actual implications. Or post on here, either or.
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Old 06-20-2015, 06:07 AM   #3
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Learning the lingo. Sandbox style is definitely what I want. I just want to goof off in whatever game I choose and not have to work with teams of people yelling into a headset. I don't want another commitment. "sorry, can't go out, gotta storm the castle with a bunch of dudes I met online."

Actually, now that I think about it. My wife and I sit side by side and surf the net all the time. Maybe we can game together. Sorry, Sal, I can't boink your elf; I gotta do the wife's pixie character under the bridge of souls.
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Old 06-20-2015, 07:14 AM   #4
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The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

May be too many quests and do this then that but you can bugger off and climb a mountain then ram a sword through a frost troll, shoot arrows at giants, sneak into a store and rob it blind, root bandits out of a cave and save a poor town from harassment, pull wings off of butterflies to make potions, learn to summon the undead to fight for you, reunite the country for or against the empire, or even do the main quest kill some dragons.

Can be played first or third person, released on 360 PS3 or PC, controls are a bit clunky on PC but you'll have the best visuals, loading times and access to mods, console will be good for trouble free gaming and the controller should be intuitive after a few hours.

GTA seems like it has the consequence of shooting at modern people, while you'll kill a few in Skyrim (actually you can get away with not killing anyone I think except for self defense) they'll be in bear skins or armor, a little dose of fantasy to keep things from getting too real.

Maybe Mass Effect or a TellTale game might be enjoyable as well, very story heavy, beats the hell out of most movies imo.

Edit: Apologies to not be recommending free games, but Skyrim is currently on sale on Steam if you have a PC good enough to run it for $10, it is not unheard of for even 'casual gamers' to sink hundreds of hours into an Elder Scrolls game, I'm at ~75 hours myself, beats the hell out of buying a movie ticket imo.

Oh and Steam has a refund policy now, within the first two weeks of owning the game if you've played less than 2 hours you should be able to 'return it' for a full refund.

Edit 2: The game is 4 years old now, should be able to play on a <$1k laptop for gaming no problem.
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Old 06-20-2015, 07:39 AM   #5
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What are the common payment models for these sorts of things, free to upload then a monthly fee? How much personal information is normally required to sign up? I have enough people with my data getting hacked every day; not looking for another one.
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Quit trying to out think the engineers and just drive the car.
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Old 06-20-2015, 07:50 AM   #6
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I desire a way to be less effective as a human, recommend an online game

All online games are pretty shitty, there is only 2 kind. 1.WOW & WOW clones ; 2. COD(CS)/LFD(TF)clones


Just go get uself skyrim/fallout & call it a day.

There is also GTA..... But I don't find the online mode in that interesting at all.


Don't forget the fact online game is basically a single game where u add some public area & extend the playtime of u getting best gears by 100-1000 times.
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Old 06-20-2015, 07:54 AM   #7
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Not exactly what I was targeting, but this one looks like a lot of fun!

http://store.steampowered.com/app/320300/
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Old 06-20-2015, 07:56 AM   #8
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I desire a way to be less effective as a human, recommend an online game

^ check the game forums on steam, they have good indicators. I know there was some giant bug in that game before so I never got it.
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Old 06-20-2015, 08:28 AM   #9
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Quote:
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What are the common payment models for these sorts of things, free to upload then a monthly fee? How much personal information is normally required to sign up? I have enough people with my data getting hacked every day; not looking for another one.
Steam is pretty solid, Valve is a very strong company, all they ask for is typical billing information like any other online store (card # and billing address). It is essentially a digital rights management platform, that is, the software you buy through them is controlled by them in order to prevent piracy. While this sounds terrible they have made the process invisible and user friendly for 99% of people (there are some weird use cases), to you the program runs in the background and is online checking in to make sure there's no funny business on your end.

Edit: You download the game after purchase and can run at any time even when not connected to the internet.

No scandals of taking information or shady business or customer information leaking to my knowledge.

If car games interest you, Automation has gotten a lot of interest, can't speak to it personally but seems nifty and it's on my list to get if it dips cheap enough on sale. You operate a car company and design cars from the bore + stroke of a ground up engine to taillight placement. It's still in development but should be fun to tool around in, a lot of people been very impressed with how realistic it is, i.e. a poorly designed engine will run like shit if at all, an 8L V8 is going to have a 4k redline etc.

Another suggestion FTL: Faster Than Light, a strategy game about piloting a spaceship and killing rebel spaceships and raiders. You can pause the action and make plans at any time so it's not heavy on reflexes but it's still brutally difficult.

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All online games are pretty shitty, there is only 2 kind. 1.WOW & WOW clones ; 2. COD(CS)/LFD(TF)clones
You forgot MOBA's and RTS's, but that basically falls into category 2 of people shouting at each other so not relevant to the thread.
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Old 06-20-2015, 09:57 AM   #10
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Do yourself a favor and pick up Fallout: New Vegas. Its not multiplayer, but I guarantee you will LOVE it. Plus Fallout 4 is right around the corner (Nov). You will get hooked like millions of others.

What you learn about MMO games is that they require time. Lots of time. If you don't commit, it's hard to stay invested.
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Old 06-20-2015, 01:54 PM   #11
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Old 06-20-2015, 05:09 PM   #12
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The downfall of GTA is you need to play with friends for it to be fun otherwise youll be playing in a public lobby with kids killing each other creating little psychopaths.

I will say GTA singleplayer is one of the best storylines ive ever played.

Fallout 3 is amazing. Skyrim is amazing. Fallout new vegas (ive heard mixed things). None of those are online but open world sandbox style/survival. I can gaurentee if you play fallout 3 youll be hooked. Nothing like shooting a ghoul with a laser rifle and having them explode! Plus fallout 4 is just far enough away to make you salavate without loosing interest.
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Old 06-20-2015, 06:57 PM   #13
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Try DriveClub for ps4 or DC Universe online if you like comics characters and have nice pvp arena.
If i live in Japan like you say i will build a team of the fastest driver on my area and beat those self-proclamed fastest in their respective turfs.
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Old 06-20-2015, 08:01 PM   #14
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I may get dogpiled on here but I think just going online and watching youtube channels of others will get you your fix if you aren't really a "gamer".
My son and I play a lot of different games but he has been watching those youtube gaming channels much more now than he plays them and it keeps him entertained.
It's much cheaper too which is fine by me as $60 a pop adds up quick. I'm looking over at the games in our cabinet and seeing about $6000+
worth of PS2, PS3 and PS4 games and wishing I just had watched them online more too.
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