Random thoughts thread

[IntotheOcean]

Originally Posted by OrbitalEllipses

Right. So how are you judging everyone who's living at home? You love sweeping statements then back pedaling when called put. :shrug: There's a reason a lot of college grads live at home and it's because we don't make $80K fresh out.

There's a lot of good reasons to stay at home, helping out your parents, saving for further education or down payment on a house or car or b.c you simply don't make enough.
But if your making 30k+ which is a pretty Average salary, and your excuse to live at home is only because 'you can't find anything as nice as your parents house' is stupid.
I mean everyone has different characters, some like to stay at home with mom and dad and don't think anything about it, while others want to gtfo and would find it embarrassing to stay.
If you enjoy staying at home and are close to your parents than don't act hurt and ignore people like me who say 'blah blah blah move out'

[trd_kid]

I hope work goes by smooth today

[Zaku]

MUST GET ALL SCHOOL WORK DONE BY ...8:30pm THEN take a nap and go to work till 6am ....//Im going to just keel over now.

[IntotheOcean]

Originally Posted by Zaku

MUST GET ALL SCHOOL WORK DONE BY ...8:30pm THEN take a nap and go to work till 6am ....//Im going to just keel over now.

You work till 6am? Whoa that's rough, I have to be up at 5am but I get out early tonight so it's not a problem.

[Want.FR-S]

Originally Posted by OrbitalEllipses

Right. So how are you judging everyone who's living at home? You love sweeping statements then back pedaling when called put. :shrug: There's a reason a lot of college grads live at home and it's because we don't make $80K fresh out.

Originally Posted by IntotheOcean

There's a lot of good reasons to stay at home, helping out your parents, saving for further education or down payment on a house or car or b.c you simply don't make enough.
But if your making 30k+ which is a pretty Average salary, and your excuse to live at home is only because 'you can't find anything as nice as your parents house' is stupid.
I mean everyone has different characters, some like to stay at home with mom and dad and don't think anything about it, while others want to gtfo and would find it embarrassing to stay.
If you enjoy staying at home and are close to your parents than don't act hurt and ignore people like me who say 'blah blah blah move out'

I wonder if there is any cultural bias to this point. Parents in North America tends to (in the old days?) kick out their children after high-school or college. I have heard stories of people who have to pay for their own college tuition, even though their parents made decent living.

On the other hand, parents from Asia will tend to keep their children in as long as possible, not only to save the money, but also keep the family together. It is the children who wants to get out when possible.

Financially speaking, if there is a room in the house already and everyone is working in the same region, there is really no point (IMO) for the child to move out. Of course, if the child thinks he/she can get the freedom and has financial means to pay for that. By all means they should move out. However, it does not hurt to save a little, or even pay back to the parents for rent to help them a little by staying home. It would be personal choices IMO, and there is no right or wrong.

[Chewie4299]

Originally Posted by Want.FR-S

I wonder if there is any cultural bias to this point. Parents in North America tends to (in the old days?) kick out their children after high-school or college. I have heard stories of people who have to pay for their own college tuition, even though their parents made decent living.

On the other hand, parents from Asia will tend to keep their children in as long as possible, not only to save the money, but also keep the family together. It is the children who wants to get out when possible.

Financially speaking, if there is a room in the house already and everyone is working in the same region, there is really no point (IMO) for the child to move out. Of course, if the child thinks he/she can get the freedom and has financial means to pay for that. By all means they should move out. However, it does not hurt to save a little, or even pay back to the parents for rent to help them a little by staying home. It would be personal choices IMO, and there is no right or wrong.

I'm currently living at home. My immediate family (mother, brother, and myself) have gone through some tough times together and for the longest time I've been helping to support us.

Right now I'm paying the entire family's cell phone bill, up until recently I was paying auto insurance for myself and my brother, I contribute towards groceries, and I am the primary caretaker of the house and yard.

We're in a better position financially now than we've been in a long time but my mother, who is 57, had to blow through her retirement savings to keep us afloat through the years. There were some poor financial decisions made in the past combined with BOA mortgage BS and just general tough times.

I never had the opportunity to go to school and, instead, began working full-time as soon as possible.

After many years of hard work I now have a very good position within my company with solid compensation. I have the ability to be self-sufficient given a little saving and preparation which I am working at now.

I have a small battle going on within myself on whether or not I should do this. I definitely feel it's hindering my social life. I am embarrassed to bring people home because right now my mother AND my grandmother live with me. There are other things hurting me in this area. Due to my home life and my general personality I've really struggled in the dating world. I'm 26 and have had one serious girlfriend. I've currently been single for an extended period of time and haven't been on a date in a long time.

I believe that moving out on my own or with a roommate if necessary will enable me to be more free in this area.

However, removing myself from the equation here would leave my mother as the only current source of income for three people. She's already going to have a very hard time when she retires so I feel some responsibility.

She would have no issue with me leaving and would support me but I'd feel bad.


I just don't know what to do. I think the outcome is inevitable, I'm 26, I don't think going back to school is on the table for me right now. I've reached a point in my professional life where I have solid experience and am earning good money in a great position. I'd have to leave for school, make a lot less money working part time, end up in debt, and possibly struggle to find a job after the fact.

[wrxgoose]

Woo! Got a date tonight. Very nervous. Dont do well on first dates. Im usually very awkward. Wish me luck!

[Zaku]

Originally Posted by IntotheOcean

You work till 6am? Whoa that's rough, I have to be up at 5am but I get out early tonight so it's not a problem.

Yes sometimes I have to work in interpreting an international broadcast for an Asian Satellite station.

[IntotheOcean]

Originally Posted by Zaku

Yes sometimes I have to work in interpreting an international broadcast for an Asian Satellite station.

That sounds intense

[OrbitalEllipses]

Originally Posted by IntotheOcean

There's a lot of good reasons to stay at home, helping out your parents, saving for further education or down payment on a house or car or b.c you simply don't make enough.
But if your making 30k+ which is a pretty Average salary, and your excuse to live at home is only because 'you can't find anything as nice as your parents house' is stupid.
I mean everyone has different characters, some like to stay at home with mom and dad and don't think anything about it, while others want to gtfo and would find it embarrassing to stay.
If you enjoy staying at home and are close to your parents than don't act hurt and ignore people like me who say 'blah blah blah move out'

Did I say that was my ONLY reason? I'm saving money, not just mooching which seems to be what you think it id. $30k a year before taxes wouldn't buy you a box on the street in this area. Maybe where you're from that could get you something, but not anywhere here. You have a bad habit of fixating on one word; read the whole thing and take it in the greater context. There's this thing called perspective...explore it.

No one's hurt brah; it's called discourse. This is a discursive discussion.

[IntotheOcean]

@Chewie4299 I'm sorry I can't offer you good advice, because honestly in your shoes I wouldn't know what to do either.
But I can tell you from a girls point of view - a girl isn't 100% turned off by a guy living at home due to a not so great situation.
I once met a really awesome guy, he was 30 and still lived at home but it was to take care of his mother with dementia.. It was really upsetting.. But I didn't think anything less of him because of it. In fact it showed me what a caring person he is.
I can't imagine how rough it must be, but it really shows you have a kind heart, which is an amazing quality to have

[IntotheOcean]

@Orbitalellipese well it's good you're setting your goals high. Sucks you live in a rich area, I know 1k+ a month can be very steep for rent. Keep saving I'm sure one day when you're making 80k you can move out

[Zaku]

Originally Posted by IntotheOcean

That sounds intense

Yeah it's once a month so I don't fuss to much about it, but this time it landed right after finals by one day so it sucked. Still I got 4 hours left before work and 35 more question on this take home test, OTL.

[OrbitalEllipses]

Originally Posted by IntotheOcean

@Orbitalellipese well it's good you're setting your goals high. Sucks you live in a rich area, I know 1k+ a month can be very steep for rent. Keep saving I'm sure one day when you're making 80k you can move out

$2K/month is par for the course for an apartment by the metro. Less for something not in downtown, but not by much.