Joke Thread - Page 3 - Toyota GR86, 86, FR-S and Subaru BRZ Forum & Owners Community

WingZer0 · 02-18-2016, 04:06 PM

babydriver · 02-18-2016, 10:47 PM

A Texas A&M Aggie and a Texas Longhorn decide to go to South Padre Island for spring break. While there, the Aggie notices that the Longhorn is getting a lot more interest than he is. He asks the Longhorn what his secret is.

The Longhorn says, "Go to the HEB and buy a medium-sized potato. Once you're at the beach, put the potato in your bathing suit. The girls will come running." The Aggie does exactly that. But instead of running up to him, the girls scream and run in the opposite direction as fast as possible!

The Aggie finds the Longhorn and says, in a confused panic, "Look, I did exactly what you said. I got a medium potato and put it down my bathing suit. But the girls all ran away!"

The Longhorn stares at him in horror and says, "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO PUT IT DOWN THE FRONT!!!"

(One of my two favorite Aggie jokes.)

babydriver · 02-18-2016, 10:53 PM

Bartender sees a guy standing at the bar with a frog on his bald head. He says, "What's with that?" Frog says, "Beats me, it started out as a wart on my ass."

nyrip · 02-19-2016, 06:50 AM

So there's an Aggie coyote and a longhorn coyote walking on either side of a fence. Both coyotes get their legs caught in bear traps. They sit for hours trying to find a way free.
Finally, the Aggie coyote calls out to the longhorn coyote, saying, "hey, if you chew through your leg, you can limp away to safety! I just freed myself that way! I'm going out for help!"
The Aggie coyote returns several hours after leaving for help to see if the longhorn coyote had freed himself, but to the Aggie coyote's suprise, he had not.
"What happened?" yelled the Aggie coyote. "Did you chew through your leg like I told you to?"
"I did" cried the longhorn coyote. "I've chewed through three of them so far, but I'm still not free!"

(it'll be a hot night in austin tonight. Gig 'em)

Tectoniic · 02-19-2016, 11:18 AM

How do you make an FRS accelerate from 0-60 in under 15 seconds?

Push it off a cliff

As a little girl is coming out of school, a man pulls up in his car, rolls down the window and says to her, "I'll give you a sweet if you'll get in the car with me."

The little girl says, "No, I not getting in the car."

The next day the same man pulls up again, rolls down the window and says to the same little girl, "I'll give you two sweets if you'll get in the car with me."

The little girl repeats, "No, I'm not getting in the car."

The third day the man pulls up and offers her a whole bag of sweets if she will get into the car.

"No Dad," replies the girl, "There's no way I'm getting into the Mustang!"

Ultramaroon · 02-19-2016, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tcoat

Oh that loser! ^^^^ Wondered where he went.

Is there a back story?

Tcoat · 02-19-2016, 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ultramaroon

Is there a back story?

Oh he was just another old dude that hung with a bad crowd. He had the most annoying avatar (Mclovin if I recall) that made it seem like you were talking to some punk. Was yet another engineer and you know what those guys can be like. He disappeared shortly before you came around I think. Would have loved to see you two battle it out over the clutch master swap!

Ultramaroon · 02-19-2016, 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tcoat

Oh he was just another old dude that hung with a bad crowd. He had the most annoying avatar (Mclovin if I recall) that made it seem like you were talking to some punk. Was yet another engineer and you know what those guys can be like. He disappeared shortly before you came around I think. Would have loved to see you two battle it out over the clutch master swap!

Interesting. I'm guessing double-E. Those guys can be super annoying.

Talus1 · 02-19-2016, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tcoat

Was yet another engineer and you know what those guys can be like.

Hey now!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ultramaroon

Interesting. I'm guessing double-E. Those guys can be super annoying.

OK, ya, that would explain it.

babydriver · 02-19-2016, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nyrip

So there's an Aggie coyote and a longhorn coyote walking on either side of a fence. Both coyotes get their legs caught in bear traps. They sit for hours trying to find a way free.
Finally, the Aggie coyote calls out to the longhorn coyote, saying, "hey, if you chew through your leg, you can limp away to safety! I just freed myself that way! I'm going out for help!"
The Aggie coyote returns several hours after leaving for help to see if the longhorn coyote had freed himself, but to the Aggie coyote's suprise, he had not.
"What happened?" yelled the Aggie coyote. "Did you chew through your leg like I told you to?"
"I did" cried the longhorn coyote. "I've chewed through three of them so far, but I'm still not free!"

(it'll be a hot night in austin tonight. Gig 'em)

I figured that there had to be an Aggie or two out there.

Here's one for you; world's coolest selfie:

Ultramaroon · 02-20-2016, 08:26 PM

Ultramaroon · 02-21-2016, 02:58 AM

credit to @jsimon7777

Tcoat · 02-22-2016, 03:49 PM

02-18-2016, 10:47 PM	#30
babydriver Hit the road and I'm gone Join Date: Oct 2014 Drives: 2015 FR-S Burnt Orange (Hot Lava) Location: Austin, TX Posts: 1,844 Thanks: 733 Thanked 1,786 Times in 973 Posts Mentioned: 10 Post(s) Tagged: 2 Thread(s)	A Texas A&M Aggie and a Texas Longhorn decide to go to South Padre Island for spring break. While there, the Aggie notices that the Longhorn is getting a lot more interest than he is. He asks the Longhorn what his secret is. The Longhorn says, "Go to the HEB and buy a medium-sized potato. Once you're at the beach, put the potato in your bathing suit. The girls will come running." The Aggie does exactly that. But instead of running up to him, the girls scream and run in the opposite direction as fast as possible! The Aggie finds the Longhorn and says, in a confused panic, "Look, I did exactly what you said. I got a medium potato and put it down my bathing suit. But the girls all ran away!" The Longhorn stares at him in horror and says, "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO PUT IT DOWN THE FRONT!!!" (One of my two favorite Aggie jokes.) __________________ Slip, slidin' away.

02-18-2016, 10:53 PM	#31
babydriver Hit the road and I'm gone Join Date: Oct 2014 Drives: 2015 FR-S Burnt Orange (Hot Lava) Location: Austin, TX Posts: 1,844 Thanks: 733 Thanked 1,786 Times in 973 Posts Mentioned: 10 Post(s) Tagged: 2 Thread(s)	Bartender sees a guy standing at the bar with a frog on his bald head. He says, "What's with that?" Frog says, "Beats me, it started out as a wart on my ass." __________________ Slip, slidin' away.

02-19-2016, 06:50 AM	#32
nyrip It's not rasp, just Rawr! Join Date: Sep 2014 Drives: Something far too loud Location: North bay, Vacavile,CA Posts: 268 Thanks: 59 Thanked 142 Times in 88 Posts Mentioned: 38 Post(s) Tagged: 4 Thread(s)	So there's an Aggie coyote and a longhorn coyote walking on either side of a fence. Both coyotes get their legs caught in bear traps. They sit for hours trying to find a way free. Finally, the Aggie coyote calls out to the longhorn coyote, saying, "hey, if you chew through your leg, you can limp away to safety! I just freed myself that way! I'm going out for help!" The Aggie coyote returns several hours after leaving for help to see if the longhorn coyote had freed himself, but to the Aggie coyote's suprise, he had not. "What happened?" yelled the Aggie coyote. "Did you chew through your leg like I told you to?" "I did" cried the longhorn coyote. "I've chewed through three of them so far, but I'm still not free!" (it'll be a hot night in austin tonight. Gig 'em) __________________ Texas registered- no cat, no muffler, no fcks given! Last edited by nyrip; 02-19-2016 at 11:46 AM.*

02-19-2016, 11:18 AM	#33
Tectoniic #FiftyShadesOfBlue Join Date: Apr 2015 Drives: 2015 FR-S Location: Chicago Posts: 1,195 Thanks: 2,086 Thanked 1,425 Times in 730 Posts Mentioned: 13 Post(s) Tagged: 4 Thread(s)	How do you make an FRS accelerate from 0-60 in under 15 seconds? Push it off a cliff As a little girl is coming out of school, a man pulls up in his car, rolls down the window and says to her, "I'll give you a sweet if you'll get in the car with me." The little girl says, "No, I not getting in the car." The next day the same man pulls up again, rolls down the window and says to the same little girl, "I'll give you two sweets if you'll get in the car with me." The little girl repeats, "No, I'm not getting in the car." The third day the man pulls up and offers her a whole bag of sweets if she will get into the car. "No Dad," replies the girl, "There's no way I'm getting into the Mustang!" __________________ Engine/Exhaust: OFT w/ E85 Tune \| FT86SF Catted UEL \| Invidia Q300 Catback Wheels/Tires/Suspension: Avid.1 AV-20 18x8.5 +33 w/ 245/35/18 PSS \| RCE Yellow Springs \| Velox LCAs Cosmetic: Valenti FT86SF Special Edition Tails \| Diode Dynamics Full HID/LEDs \| BRZ Fender Garnishes

02-20-2016, 08:26 PM	#39
Ultramaroon 義理チョコ Join Date: Sep 2014 Drives: a 13 e8h frs Location: vantucky, wa Posts: 31,871 Thanks: 52,137 Thanked 36,522 Times in 18,923 Posts Mentioned: 1107 Post(s) Tagged: 9 Thread(s)	__________________ service manuals

02-18-2016, 04:06 PM	#29
WingZer0 Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2013 Drives: 2013 FR-S Location: Here Posts: 1,184 Thanks: 2,091 Thanked 2,416 Times in 866 Posts Mentioned: 15 Post(s) Tagged: 2 Thread(s)

02-21-2016, 02:58 AM	#40
Ultramaroon 義理チョコ Join Date: Sep 2014 Drives: a 13 e8h frs Location: vantucky, wa Posts: 31,871 Thanks: 52,137 Thanked 36,522 Times in 18,923 Posts Mentioned: 1107 Post(s) Tagged: 9 Thread(s)	credit to @jsimon7777 __________________ service manuals

02-22-2016, 03:49 PM	#41
Tcoat Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Drives: 2020 Hakone Location: London, Ont Posts: 69,845 Thanks: 61,656 Thanked 108,283 Times in 46,456 Posts Mentioned: 2495 Post(s) Tagged: 50 Thread(s)	__________________ Racecar spelled backwards is Racecar, because Racecar.

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Is there a thread for 'people doing stupid things in their brand new car' thread?	Symbiont	FR-S & 86 Photos, Videos, Wallpapers, Gallery Forum	36	02-18-2013 12:24 PM
AZ bs thread	sfwg	Southwest	185	09-11-2012 03:11 AM
Not another BRZ vs WRX thread...	stayclam	BRZ First-Gen (2012+) -- General Topics	5	02-28-2012 02:58 PM
The "if you wanna kiss the backside of white musicians make a thread about it" Thread	aliphian	Off-Topic Lounge [WARNING: NO POLITICS]	8	12-19-2011 07:59 PM
Joke Thread	VenomRush	Off-Topic Lounge [WARNING: NO POLITICS]	27	07-09-2011 12:44 AM

User Name		Remember Me?
Password