"Not Always Right" Customer Stories?

[cdrazic93]

Wait, whats the chain of command now? Can I be first mate...

[airjonny]

Here's a couple from this week

TUESDAY
Me: Thank you sir, how may I help you today.

Customer: It looks like I'm past due on my account and there's a hold on the card. Is there a way you can reinstate it if I pay today? I really need it for an emergency.

Me: I do apologize, but after payments are made on past due accounts, it takes around 48 hours for cards to be reinstated. But we can make exceptions for financial hardships. What's going on?

Customer: My son needs his Xbox live account renewed.

Me: *facepalm* .....

Customer: So can it be reinstated?

Me: .........

Customer: Hello??

Me: I'm sorry maam, the types of exceptions we make are for hardships like food and paying other bills like the gas, water, etc

Customer: ....well I'm going to Olive Garden tonight? Does that count?

Me: *double facepalm*



THURSDAY
Customer: I need to close this account.

Me: Umm...sir it looks like it was closed already due to it failing past 60 days.

Customer: What? I miss a couple days and you close my card??

Me: ...sir it was 60 days.

Customer: Well (other big bank) doesn't do this!! *goes into rant about how my company is greedy*

Me: *mutes phone* well take your deadbeat ass over there so they can deal with you!



TODAY
Me: *Entering in customers account, but no results found* I'm sorry, I'm not getting anything. Is this a (my bank) card?

Customer: *in an annoyed old man voice* NO! It's with (other competitor bank)!

Me: ......Sir, you called (my bank).

Customer: And?? Do you want me to pay my bill or not! This is why I don't bank with you guys!

[Tcoat]

Originally Posted by Ultramaroon

Tcoat's off the grid this weekend so I'm taking over FOSD.

[Ultramaroon]

Originally Posted by Tcoat

Ohhh heyyyyy, Tony, you're back. So great to see you! How was the trip?

I kept the thread all nice and tidy for ya.

[Tcoat]

The trip was cold, stormy, and got no sleep. We had a blast!!!!!

[Special_K]

Working IT phone line for the university campus during dead-week so I was a bit strung out.

Caller: I'm trying to print this photo but it keeps coming out in black&white!
Me: Ok, which printer are you using?
Caller: The one sitting on my desk in my office.
Me: Well we supply the offices with black&white printers so I'm afraid that color printing is impossible.
Caller: That can't be correct I've printed in color before! Can't you just add a cartridge? I need to print this funny picture of my cat.
Me: No you haven't, no I can't, and no you don't!.. Also, please use your work printer solely for work purposes. Haveanicedaybye!

[Tcoat]

[Special_K]

One thing that I HATE more anything is people trying to use terminology they randomly heard in order to sound knowledgeable, but ultimately it just makes diagnosing the problem that much harder. My dad does the every single time and it drives me nuts!

e.g.
Customer tells a mechanic:
"I think you need to check the tire manifold for wear marks because I'm getting weird vibrations in the distributor cap."

Customer tells IT support:
"I changed some settings in BIOS trying to get my ethernet port running faster, but now somethings wrong with the GUI because I can't access my root registry UNIX, all I was trying to do is downstream this picture from my email!"

Customer tells designer:
"Why don't you just use the mask tool to put more emphasis on your Java, it shouldn't take you this long to draw the HTML just to make the Div keep CSS'ing."

[Tcoat]

Originally Posted by Special_K

One thing that I HATE more anything is people trying to use terminology they randomly heard in order to sound knowledgeable, but ultimately it just makes diagnosing the problem that much harder. My dad does the every single time and it drives me nuts!

e.g.
Customer tells a mechanic:
"I think you need to check the tire manifold for wear marks because I'm getting weird vibrations in the distributor cap."

Customer tells IT support:
"I changed some settings in BIOS trying to get my ethernet port running faster, but now somethings wrong with the GUI because I can't access my root registry UNIX, all I was trying to do is downstream this picture from my email!"

Customer tells designer:
"Why don't you just use the mask tool to put more emphasis on your Java, it shouldn't take you this long to draw the HTML just to make the Div keep CSS'ing."

I run into this all the time usually with medical or body part terms.
My favorite was a guy that called in one time to see if we had modified work for an injury he received at home. He told me on the phone that he had "lacerated his bicep" in a fall. I tell him we can have him come in and do some cleaning with one arm no problem and he says "great".
He shows up at work on crutches and a cast on his leg. I say "I though you cut your arm?" He replies I told you I "lacerated my bicep". I said "no, you fractured your tibia go home and we will see you in a few weeks"!

[Eski]

[Tcoat]

[Special_K]

Originally Posted by Tcoat

I run into this all the time usually with medical or body part terms.
My favorite was a guy that called in one time to see if we had modified work for an injury he received at home. He told me on the phone that he had "lacerated his bicep" in a fall. I tell him we can have him come in and do some cleaning with one arm no problem and he says "great".
He shows up at work on crutches and a cast on his leg. I say "I though you cut your arm?" He replies I told you I "lacerated my bicep". I said "no, you fractured your tibia go home and we will see you in a few weeks"!

I'm guilty of this one, but just because it wasn't my first language though. Had to go to a hospital in Spain, and I was a proficient enough speaker to get by, but I didn't know any medical terminology. That was... interesting

[Tcoat]

Originally Posted by Special_K

I'm guilty of this one, but just because it wasn't my first language though. Had to go to a hospital in Spain, and I was a proficient enough speaker to get by, but I didn't know any medical terminology. That was... interesting

That is when saying "my tummy hurts" is enough to get by anyway.
If the guy hadn't tried to be all technical and simply said "I broke my leg" it would have avoided a lot of hassle.

[Special_K]

Originally Posted by Tcoat

That is when saying "my tummy hurts" is enough to get by anyway.
If the guy hadn't tried to be all technical and simply said "I broke my leg" it would have avoided a lot of hassle.

The problem I had was the other way around... More along the lines of "I put this pill where?!" After much miming I sorted out that it was in fact NOT a suppository. HA!