[JazzleSAURUS]

1) So are camber bolts = crash bolts? i'm assuming these are interchangeable terms?

Up front, camber bolts are a bolt with a lobe on them, they allow you to turn the bolt, and it will adjust camber. Crash bolts are a bolt of a smaller diameter that clamps the strut clevice in place, but is thinner than the part that came on the car from the dealer so you get some camber adjustment.

2) Do I only need 2 camber bolts for only the front wheels or 4 for front and back?

You need two bolts total, one per side, front only.

3) Where would I go about finding some camber/crash? I'm looking around online and nothing seems to be jumping out as correct.

You can get the crash bolts from your local Toyota or Subaru dealer. You can also run camber bolts, but I think for your purposes, (less extreme,) you don't need as much camber as they can provide so going with an OEM solution is a preferable one.

4) So if I understand correctly overall, you're saying that (after step 3) without the 3mm spacers my front wheels will probably be flush but my back wheels will not?

I think the fronts will be perfect, and the rears will be very close. The 3mm spacer I think will be enough to make it not noticable, but because most of the cars I work with are lowered a bit, there's a bit of 'your mileage may vary' between every car being oh so slightly different, and differing opinions on what is close enough to flush.