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ok i figured it out.
it's an aftermarket KARR alarm, presumably installed by the dealer and never removed. a KARR 4040a, i think...
when the alarm has been triggered, or there is some kind of problem with the alarm, it signals this using the horn when you turn the car on. 3 quick honks.
to get rid of it, you have to reset the alarm using an elaborate set of steps that involve turning the car on and pressing that button they've installed under the dash.
in my case, the actual problem was that the dealer didn't plug in the valet button very well. and another one of the vampire taps wasn't all the way on. so after i completely unplugged everything and plugged it all back in nice and secure, it's working well.
only annoying part is that when i lock the car, it makes a honk... there's a configure mode though. ignition on then off, and then click the valet button 3 times to toggle the honks. haven't tried that yet
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