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I remember four years ago when my brother got t-boned in his old BMW in a parking lot by a huge Jeep. When they took it in to the dealership they originally said that it could be easily repaired as it seemed to just be the door that had been damaged, but just two days later they called back and said that the damage was more extensive than they predicted and the car was indeed totaled. Most of the time when mechanics do a first-time damage diagnosis they just eyeball it and rely on their assumptions which are almost always wrong. Never trust a mechanic's judgement when he uses phrases like "it looks like...", or "it seems to me...".
Not saying you should lose hope or anything but they probably haven't even removed the panels yet and looked at the frame.
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