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One of the things I tell students is, no matter what your skill or experience level, driving at the limit (the car's and yours) should be just a little difficult the whole time.
If it feels easy, you are probably going too slow.
If it feels like pulling teeth, you are probably trying to go too fast.
The limiting factor for new autocrossers is usually the eyes. Figuring out where the next element is AND what you intend to do when you get there will make your right foot wait longer than it wants too, but it will also make the sport a LOT easier. (And death grip moments more rare)As you get comfortable speaking "cone" the delay will get shorter and shorter.
Let the car do the work. Just tell it what you want and try to be reasonable with your demands.
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