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Haggling for the sake of haggling can make for a negative experience. When I bought mine used back in May, I had done tons of research and shopping, and I knew the price of the car was fair, and it was a great deal compared with some others that were for sale at other dealers, especially since mine had only 17K miles on it, and most others had 30K+. It was also a color I loved, and was in flawless condition.
In the end, what I negotiated on was what they gave me for my trade. I had a number in my head I wanted for my trade going in, and they initially offered less...did some haggling, and they came up to the number I wanted, so I was very happy with the deal I got. Granted, my sales guy was phenomenal - I bought my car at a BMW dealership, so the service overall was stellar - but I think you can have a good experience if you go in with the right attitude.
Many people go into the car buying experience ready for a fight, and it makes the process very ugly. But if you've done your research, you know what a fair price is for the car you want, know what you CAN pay, and have an idea of trade in value and interest rate going in, it doesn't have to be such a hostile experience. You also have to be prepared to walk away without the car if you can't get to a win-win deal, and that's the part many people have a hard time with. The sales guys are in the business to make money - dealerships aren't non-profit organizations...but that doesn't mean you have to get screwed.
In the end stop worrying about what every is telling you to do, and do what works best for you and your personal financial situation.
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