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Welcome to the forum Eg0. I am fairly new to the world of wheels but I will see what I can do to help from what I have read so far.
A 35mm offset would give you a fairly flush finish. The fronts will be more flush than the rears but that is just how this car is designed.
As for your tire size, I would try to get something to match the diameter of the stock tires. A 235/35 would be good for the 18x8.5 and a 245/30 would be good for the 18x9.5.
As for your other points, if this is just your DD and you are just going for looks, there is no need to drop a tonne of money on coils. Some lowering springs will do the job at a fraction of the cost.
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