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-   -   Muffled in my thoughts............. (https://www.ft86club.com/forums/showthread.php?t=41933)

Dustin 07-17-2013 06:47 PM

Muffled in my thoughts.............
 
It's terrible that it has become the norm to be wary of people you don't know or who offer help when you don't know why. Why does there have to be a why? I'm sort of muffled in my thoughts right now as to if I did or did not do enough but I'm trying to work them out the best I can.

I got off of work today and did a few things out of the norm. I went to my bank first then went and picked up my kids from daycare instead of the other way around. As soon as I got back on the road it started pouring down rain. Instead of getting on the highway as I normally would have done I stayed on the access road heading east, I only had to go down to the next exit. I came to the top of a hill to see a 16-17 year old kid walking in the rain. Again, on the norm I would have kept on driving any other day but given that it was pouring and given that we we're a mile and a half away from the next populated area, I pulled over and asked him if he wanted to get in and I could take him at least to the next exit where if it was still raining hard he could go inside a local restaurant or gas station until the weather passed. I asked and he declined 3 times. I said okay and went along my way.

I go one other place before getting my boys from daycare and start heading home west bound now. Weather has been bad off and on over the past couple of days so seeing traffic moving slow is nothing new. However today on the eastbound side traffic was at a standstill from in between the two exits I mentioned earlier all the way back about 3-4 miles. The kid I offered the ride to tried to cross the interstate and was hit by an 18 wheeler. There wasn't much left of him.

I've never been a man who believes in fate or things happen for a reason but it makes me raise an eyebrow as to why did I do so many things out of the norm today that put me on the path of this young person only to not make a difference in the outcome of his life when I was probably the last person he ever spoke to. Do I just chalk it up to bad luck? Did I do enough? Should I have pressed harder for him to accept my offer? I'm unsure of things right now and that is also out of the norm for me. This might take a while to sort through.

sklimo 07-17-2013 06:54 PM

WOW!!! Holy shit man............. I can only say you did ALL you could by offering a ride. DO NOT think that there was anything else you could have done. I would look at it this way. It was his time to go. If he would have gotten in car may have taken you with him....... Just my 2 cents. Wish you all the best

Beyer Subaru 07-17-2013 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dustin (Post 1077294)
.


You did everything that you could brother. He was doing what we are all supposed to do and he said "no".

That's it. Plain and simple. He was living his life and you yours.

That your day was out of kilter and had you cross his path was just a fact of life.

I can change my habits by minutes or seconds and it has altered my life happenings in huge ways or made no change at all.
It means that because I was doing 70 in a 35 I missed Bambi's head by centimeters or I was doing 45 in a 35 means that johnny law got to write me a ticket for failure to obey a highway sign. You just can't plan life's little happenings that can affect you in small ways or astronomically huge ways.

I was in the kinda the same scenario several years back. I was on the way home heading westbound. At the time it was raining buckets and buckets. I just happened to look left and noticed a yougster walking in the rain eastbound. She was minding her own business and I mine. I said what the hell, I'm not in a hurry anywhere. I might as well bust a u-turn and offer her a ride. What's the worst thing that's gonna happen? She could kill me, rob me or just say yes/no.
I made the turn, pulled up to her and offered her a ride. At first she said no. I gave her the "c'mon look?" and she jumped in. I took her a couple of miles down the street and let her out where she was walking to.

No harm no foul. Could I have been a murdering, psycho, rapist, pedo etc? Sure. Could she have been a cracked out whore with a switchblade at the ready? sure.

You can never get in someone else's head to know exactly what they are thinking. Just do the best you that you can and hope others will do the same.

Try not to let it get you down and don't think about the 'what ifs". Live for today, your kids and yours.

sklimo 07-17-2013 08:05 PM

^This to the fullest.

TylerLieberman 07-17-2013 08:10 PM

You did what you could. You could have spent an hour offering him a ride and he could still say no.

You can't help somebody who doesn't want to be helped. In the end, no matter how much of a convincing argument you could have made, he is the one who still chooses his own path and what he does.

You offered and that's more than most others would do.

Dustin 07-17-2013 08:17 PM

Thanks for the encouraging words guys.

On a possible more hopeful note, I was misinformed about his outcome. He may yet still live.

http://m.weatherforddemocrat.com/wea...tguid=gryUQjzX

zoomzoomers 07-17-2013 08:18 PM

This comes to mind here...

"Ours is not to question why, ours is but to do or die".

by Lord Alfred Tennyson

You "DID" so there you have it. Sometimes no matter what you do, you can't change what is. The faster you accept that, the faster you will find peace.

FiRStsc10n 07-17-2013 08:20 PM

The problem is the media now a days. Media, internet, and word-of-mouth are full of stories of people being picked up by strangers and they are never seen of again because the driver was a bad person, or driver's don't want to pick up hitchhikers because they are afraid of being held at gunpoint, robbed, who knows. I'm not at all saying everyone is a bad person, there are plenty of good/honest people out there.

I would have said no just like him, especially at the age of 16, he was probably just obeying his parents commands of don't talk to strangers, don't get in cars with strange people. None of this is your fault, you tried, it seems you can't be nice and honest no more. If it was a 16 year old girl you probably would of had the cops called on you.

Sportsguy83 07-17-2013 08:41 PM

Wow, what a story... Gives you chills.

FnFast 07-17-2013 09:01 PM

That's crazy! You did all you can do. Everything should have a different conclusion in hindsight. I always pull over and try to help people who are on the side of the road... flat tire, etc. People are freaked out by people helping. It's society as a general rule. We allow the freaks to live in it through the justice system and they ruin the concept of humanity.

Wish him well and the best.

Anthony 07-21-2013 09:03 AM

Holy shit. This sounds made up. Not that it is, it's just an incredible story. Any updates on the kid? I would've said no too, if I were him in that situation.

I wonder what happened for him to get hit by a big truck though. Obviously he was safety-concious enough to say no to a ride from a stranger, SURELY he would've looked before trying to cross the interstate.

Dustin 07-21-2013 10:06 PM

He was pronounced dead at the hospital that afternoon. I had a DPS officer come up to my work so I could give him a statement on our interacton just before th incident occured. Tragic how things turned out.

http://weatherforddemocrat.com/top-n...-I-20-released

Symmetrical 07-21-2013 10:11 PM

That is quite a story :(

But it seems you did all you can do, and fate has already been decided for the kid unfortunately.

I had a cousin (in cambodia) who got hit by a car 2 times, survived each time. Then just one random day he rode his bicycle and got hit by a car the 3rd time and was killed instantly. Sometimes things just aren't explainable.

But keep your head up, you are already an amazing person for even offering a ride, not once, but three times. That's more than any stranger will even blink an eye to nowadays.

Anthony 07-21-2013 11:04 PM

Man, sorry to hear that.


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