To build something better in our own self image
 

For a very long time I have asked myself why we are we here. I think our purpose in life is to follow what inspires us the most. For me, Technology has always been a passion and out of that passion my goal in life is to build something even better than ourselves. I want to be able to help create technology that will surpass our very own intelligence something that will change humanity. To make life easier. Sorry just ranting what was on my mind.

Like a friend zone escape device? :D I kid I kid

Skynet in 3, 2, 1...


You aren't using this life effectively, so we're re-purposing it.

I'm not using this life effectively?


Currently I have a certification in Computer Technology. Working on getting my degree in Computer Science.

YOU MUST HAVE CHILDREN.

YOUR LIFE WILL HAVE MEANING ONCE YOU HAVE CHILDREN.

YOUR LIFE IS EMPTY WITHOUT CHILDREN.

HAVING CHILDREN MAKES YOU A BETTER PERSON.

CHILDREN ARE A GIFT FROM GOD.

SO WHEN ARE YOU HAVING CHILDREN?

THEN YOU WILL BE ONE OF US.

ONE OF US.

ONE OF US.



Sent from our street where my wife and I purchased our first home two years ago. Dear Jesus please save us. I have never been given so much unsolicited advice in my life. Sometimes my wife and I feel like we're in a zombie film...all these stay-at-home moms...

You are missing his sarcasm...

Put the books down for a minute and enjoy your life a bit...

Lighten up.

Also, after reading your "Relationship Advise" thread...

You also do not have a good grasp on emotional cues.

My suggestion for both of your quandaries is to watch the following movies.

Mary and Max

The Grand Budapest Hotel

Both of these movies may offer you some perspective.

The Marriage/Kids thing is for many, a "belief system" like religion. It's sort of human nature for people to project their beliefs onto others. Because I'm not yet married and don't have a desire to reproduce I feel like an atheist in a bible studies class at this point in my life.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJsw71NYr08"]gallagher baby - YouTube[/ame]

How old is OP?

Are you saying he has asperger's or autism?

One of the cues is the inability to detect and process sarcasm so it stands to reason.

Rocket.BRZ: Do you personally identify with the TV characters; Sheldon from "Big Bang Theory" or Abed from "Community"? If so, you may want to pursue research regarding these conditions. Knowing is half the battle.

18

I would say your right that sometimes I am unable to detect and process sarcasm. I'm a very serious person. I'm not a very easy person to read from what I've been told. My facial expressions are very minimal.

You're only 18? God bless you. Bro stop thinking so much and enjoy life. You will miss it. Forget that chick and don't worry changing the future. Enjoy now.

Yea. Don't let normal people pull you back. Find a passion, pursue it, and create within it. the girl will come once you start down that path.

It all makes sense now.

Lol that is my thing. I'm always researching, always trying to find the next best thing. I do party a little but I'm a career focused guy.

Just chill out bud. I'm the same age as you so I get where your coming from. I know its probably a crazy time for you right now with the unknowns of the future ahead of you and you want the reassurance that everything will work out. But it really doesn't help overthinking things and worrying about every little thing. Just enjoy yourself and remember that not everything will work out 100% perfect everytime, just make do with what you do have.

Too much technology removes the human aspect of things. After reading your other posts it seems like you may prefer that. Then again you are only 18 and probably have a raging hormone level OVER 9000!!! *scouter breaks*. If you find any of this offensive then I am correct.

I have two certs in computers, two dogs, two cars, and a wife. Do I think I'm using my life 'effectively' ? No...not yet. Stop trying to find an instrument to measure yourself on. Just be a happy 18yr old with limited responsibility. I swear to whatever the fuck you believe in that you'll miss this time in your life when you start getting up there in age.

I don't want to see you turn into another YOLOSWAGDGAFBRO but it seems as if you are 'book' intelligent enough to live a carefree life while not being a total idiot. Rock out with your cock out and let your hair down once in a while.

...but not the cock thing like in a park where kids play. That's bad.

We're here to have sex and eat. Get used to it.

I don't find your words of wisdom offensive. You may be right about the technology aspect as I do prefer it's lack of emotion. For my whole life I have lived technology. When I was 3 years old my mom and dad gave me my first computer. I loved the thing and I would spend every second of my time on it. As I got older, it appeared to me that I did not share common interests with other boys my age. They played sports, they were more curious with girls, they loved what most men loved to do. As for myself, I would stay inside build structures using magnetic connecting rods and or read, or use a computer during recess. The lack of human interaction is what made me who I am. Sometimes I find myself more common to a machine than a human. Yet I desire human emotion, feelings. My parents also sheltered me a lot which made it difficult for me as I got older. I was shown to be polite, to act in a business fashion. I lived in the walls of the business (campground) and knew of very little from the outside of it. When I in 6th grade my parents divorced. I never will and can't forgive them
For what they put me through during that divorce it still haunts me today. I was forced to move between houses every week till I turned 17. During 8th grade that emotion broke through and every thought of hatred broke out and I threatened and fought many people at school. Through therapy I became my former self. My family has also given me whatever I wanted and I don't want to sound like a spoiled brat but sometimes I think being given all this stuff has caused more harm then good. It has shown me to work hard to succeed in life. Do want and only desire the best. But I feel like I should've worked harder for what they gave me. My first ever relationship was an odd one she only desired sex, the girl that have me my first kiss. But I couldn't give her what she wanted because I wanted more than just sex I wanted true love. My second relationship I traveled 6 hours twice a month to see. I adored her, I tried to help her in anyway possible and spoiled her like I was spoiled. She was the girl that I had a crush on in 6th grade. And finally she dumped me, I thought of killing myself at the time because of emotions that I don't know how to deal with. Later in my life my whole world disappeared as the campground was sold. My whole life was that place. It was almost like dealing with the divorce twice. I think of the past so often because it is what keeps me happy, from going over the edge. I think from being sheltered and choosing to feeling no emotions like my machines has caused me to react the way I do. Because I don't know how to deal with them. Sometimes I wonder if it is better to have no emotions at all. Maybe that is why I strive to build something better than us.

Dude I read your whole comment so know that I'm not blowing you off when I say this:

You need to stop. You're putting entirely too much information about yourself on this forum. Someone is going to come along and rip you apart. I will not be that person.

My brother is the same age as you...and your problem is you wallow in your own self-pity and enjoy putting this information out on public forums because you want others to feel sorry for you. That may not be at the forefront of your conscience but that's exactly what you're doing. It's (very) human nature. You're reaching out...and I'm not faulting you for it but I am saying it how it is.

You are up your own ass with trying to sound eloquent. Stop. For someone who says they prefer 'machines' over humans you are showing us more and more just how human you are. You're 18. Your chemicals are all out of whack and it's like a shitstorm in your mind. The events in your life shape you to an extent but you can choose what to do with them...another reason why you're utterly human.

Move forward. Do not live in the past. My language is harsh and that's how I talk. I'm not trying to be offensive. If this is constructive for you then that's awesome...however I would suggest you use the brakes a little when you post in a public forum.

Why am I writing this? Normally I would just read this, form my opinions, and close the tab...but I watched a certain famous director's son's videos before the Santa Barbara incident and you are reminding me of him.

I hope you are far more intelligent.

OK let me break it down...

Its not all about you. Forgive your parents for getting a divorce.

Be an 18 year old. Sex-only relationships are ok. You are probably incapable of a mature love anyway. You will only experience that unbridled dangerous LUST. Hence the suicide thoughts.

Stop trying to be the dark brooding hero like Dexter.

Inside joke @ the other Forums guy...
*Can you post some more pictures of your Monte Carlo?

If you really want a "real relationship" that has love, you need to grow up.

You probably are a really smart guy who probably struggles with lots of day to day activities.

And @RiceClassic ; Yeah I think he may have Aspberger's (though they changed it recently) or maybe Autism.

One other tidbit of advice.

On an internet forum, after each sentence/thought, hit the "Enter Key" twice. Makes your attempt at communication easier to read and understand.

Ever think about going to see a psychologist? The hormonal years have a lot of shit swirling around, and it sounds like you've got some other issues that need to be dealt with as well. In the very least, you'll have someone to vent to who won't judge you, but can tell you why you feel the way you do.

I know you're young and are yearning for companionship and maybe are even having a bit of an existential crisis since it's time to move out and up into the world, but things tend to sort themselves out. Stop looking for a meaning to life and let it find you. Find more like-minded people that enjoy the same hobbies you do. Sounds like you may be sort of an introvert, so you're probably going to have to go out of your comfort zone at least to some degree for that. But it'll give you that human connection you want, whether you know it or not.

Oh, and then work on FTL travel. That's what we need next. ;)

The OP sounds like a great "Objective Statement" for a resume if you're applying to Google. So get on it ;)

I'll tell you this much. Simply wanting to grow and allowing your actions and decisions to be guided by that pretense is enough for you to achieve it. Quit being cynical and open your mind. You're too young to be jaded. Yes you probably have it hard, but so do many others. Find yourself and then embrace it. Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you. What I gather from your first post is that you don't seem to understand that growth and finding yourself will not occur overnight, or over a year, or even over decades. It is a lifelong journey that you should enjoy.

I'm 19 and I had a very similar mindset when I was your age. I was introverted (still am), very very shy, and close minded. Today, I am a very different person now compared to my 18 year old self and I'm happier than I ever was before, yet I still greatly look forward to what may lie ahead. It'll take a bit of guts at first, but do something ballsy that will require you to change some part about yourself that makes you unhappy. Go to school far away or do different things. Try daydreaming or smoking weed. Just don't ever lose sight of what makes you happy and don't be stupid, but don't overthink things (this will become clear to you later).

CJ??? Is this you again?

Actually I think first you should start off by reading this thread:
http://www.ft86club.com/forums/showthread.php?t=53459

All 600+ pages of it. Then realize how much better off you are than the rest of us sickos. :D

LOL true story

Here is my advice, stop being a mopey idiot.
On the other hand start cutting and use it to get that lady to love you out of guilt.

Since we pretty much know you're CJ at this point ill go get my popcorn ready.

To build a better world you must find out what you appreciate that most and try to share you're findings with the world. Based on your posts you seem very stressed/excited/nervous about the future which is very understandable . I was in your shoes just a mere 4 years ago (I graduate with a CS degree in August), and hopefully what I type next helps you. Drop all your expectations , make the most of every situation , try new things , make more (new) friends , go travel somwhere you've never been , and most importantly appreciate every little detail about your life and you'll be more than prepared to start school , graduate and leave a lasting impact on those who have the blessing of meeting you.

Also if you need help with CS stuff it seems a good number of us here have some education in the field so don't be afraid to ask for help!

/longNotThoughOutRant