lost my step-dad 5/25/13. :( - Toyota GR86, 86, FR-S and Subaru BRZ Forum & Owners Community

charged86 · 05-26-2013, 11:30 AM

So I kind of feel like you all on this site are my friends. I have lived everyday with my mother and stepfather since 1995. I am 33 now. My stepdad Mott. Age 65 and army and army reserve retiree. Also public defender / prosecuter and lawyer father of 4 grandfather of 9. Died from a massive stroke. He had just walked his beloved dog and my dog Abby at the park his favorite thing to do died Saturday night. I am very sad. Been crying since Friday. I'm currently laying on his side of the bed face hurting from crying. And I just needed to say this out loud. I look at life differently now since I am in shock. I also had my own very intense close brush with death and should not be here today as the doctors explained to me. My stepdad Mott, helped me and my mother through that ordeal.

So in Honor of Mott Virgin Plummer. Age 65. My hero. An American. Hero. Public servant

I love you Mott with all my heart to me you are my father. I miss you so bad it hurts.

oofie · 05-26-2013, 11:31 AM

sorry to hear...my condolences to you and your family

CodyFRS · 05-26-2013, 11:38 AM

I am sorry for your loss, we all lose loved ones and feel the need to express it in different ways. We here are all a close community, (at least that's how I feel.) and never feel ashamed to express your true emotions. I mean, isn't that really what forum/blogs are made for? My sympathy and prayers go out to you and your family during these tragic times. I myself have gone through some close calls with death (internal bleeding/lacerated liver, blood poisioning, bit by extremely venemous Brown Reclus spider and surpassed. Which to this day makes me wonder who is looking over my shoulder protecting me. All I can say is, Even though you are going through a tragic time and in extreme hurt. Don't let this keep and hold you down for to long, you see that life really isn't all that long. Live every moment to the fullest. You don't want to lose critical time doing something you could have really enjoyed, but instead we just sit at home. Last but probably the most important, which I am still learning as a 20 year old. Love your family and spend time with them. You don't know how much time you have to spend with them and honestly they are most likely going to be the ones that will ALWAYS be there for you, through thick and thin..

Cody.

Mikem53 · 05-26-2013, 11:42 AM

My condolences.. Such is life.. Losing a loved one is very hard to deal with..
Death is a part of life.. Something we all face.. Sounds like he didn't suffer much.. And you should take some comfort in that..
Time will heal the hurt.. And your memories will keep him alive..

charged86 · 05-26-2013, 11:43 AM

Thank you Cody. You brought a tear to my eye but also some relief. Im glad your still here too

Quote:

Originally Posted by CodyFRS

I am sorry for your loss, we all lose loved ones and feel the need to express it in different ways. We here are all a close community, (at least that's how I feel.) and never feel ashamed to express your true emotions. I mean, isn't that really what forum/blogs are made for? My sympathy and prayers go out to you and your family during these tragic times. I myself have gone through some close calls with death (internal bleeding/lacerated liver, blood poisioning, bit by extremely venemous Brown Reclus spider and surpassed. Which to this day makes me wonder who is looking over my shoulder protecting me. All I can say is, Even though you are going through a tragic time and in extreme hurt. Don't let this keep and hold you down for to long, you see that life really isn't all that long. Live every moment to the fullest. You don't want to lose critical time doing something you could have really enjoyed, but instead we just sit at home. Last but probably the most important, which I am still learning as a 20 year old. Love your family and spend time with them. You don't know how much time you have to spend with them and honestly they are most likely going to be the ones that will ALWAYS be there for you, through thick and thin..

Cody.

Barbarian · 05-26-2013, 11:43 AM

My condolences to you and your family.

dem00n · 05-26-2013, 11:46 AM

Sorry for your loss.

-Dimitri

FRiSson · 05-26-2013, 11:48 AM

Sorry for your loss.

charged86 · 05-26-2013, 11:55 AM

Sonolin · 05-26-2013, 01:47 PM

Sorry man. I can't imagine I haven't lost anybody so close to me yet.

Best wishes.

charged86 · 05-26-2013, 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sonolin

Sorry man. I can't imagine I haven't lost anybody so close to me yet.

Best wishes.

Thank you! Its very hard seriously the best advice i can give you please don't fight with family and spend time as much as possible. And take photos! Photos and more photos

kthxbai · 05-26-2013, 02:25 PM

Thank you so much for sharing your story and the story of your stepfather. Life is the most ironic thing in the universe; it can bring so much joy to you and bring you so much heartache in the same. I don't know you and your family, but my heart, thoughts, and prayers go out to you and your family during this trying time. I wish you all the best and my condolences.

root · 05-26-2013, 02:31 PM

Hang in there man. I suddenly lost my mother to a stroke 3 years ago. It's rough, one moment everything is going on like a regular day, the next moment you're holding her in your arms realizing that woman who raised you feels so frail now and waiting the agonizing minutes for the ambulance.
The one solace was that she did not suffer much, but it still seemed too soon, she was still very active, about same age as your dad.
Lean on friends. It helped me a lot to have someone visit who wasn't part of family. Having someone who wasn't immediately close helped to break the tension and deafening emptiness and start to bring a feel of outside life and normalcy back.

suaveflooder · 05-26-2013, 02:46 PM

We just lost my grandmother this week as well. It was a SUPER emotional week, but WOW the houses were all crazy! It was literally a 4 day party of laughter, tears and lots of drinking!

This part of life sucks, but just as @Mikem53 pointed out, his legacy lives on in your life and those of your family! We got to see my grandmother's legacy all week in her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren! You would be AMAZED at all the stories we told! We all had manhattans (Grandmom's drink of choice), and I got to see family I haven't since I was young! It was EXACTLY how she would have planned it had she been alive!

Take time off and allow yourself to greave and to celebrate all the things he did with his life! My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. I am truly sorry for your loss.

05-26-2013, 11:30 AM	#1
charged86 Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Drives: whiteout gt86 2015 IS350fsport Location: northern kentucky. cincy Posts: 1,931 Thanks: 2,154 Thanked 697 Times in 437 Posts Mentioned: 42 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	lost my step-dad 5/25/13. :( So I kind of feel like you all on this site are my friends. I have lived everyday with my mother and stepfather since 1995. I am 33 now. My stepdad Mott. Age 65 and army and army reserve retiree. Also public defender / prosecuter and lawyer father of 4 grandfather of 9. Died from a massive stroke. He had just walked his beloved dog and my dog Abby at the park his favorite thing to do died Saturday night. I am very sad. Been crying since Friday. I'm currently laying on his side of the bed face hurting from crying. And I just needed to say this out loud. I look at life differently now since I am in shock. I also had my own very intense close brush with death and should not be here today as the doctors explained to me. My stepdad Mott, helped me and my mother through that ordeal. So in Honor of Mott Virgin Plummer. Age 65. My hero. An American. Hero. Public servant I love you Mott with all my heart to me you are my father. I miss you so bad it hurts. __________________ INSTAGRAM @Rcf_700 www.youtube.com/boostindub

05-26-2013, 11:46 AM	#7
dem00n Member of the year - 2016 Join Date: Jul 2012 Drives: Scion FRS Location: New York Posts: 3,575 Thanks: 788 Thanked 2,427 Times in 1,111 Posts Mentioned: 23 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	Sorry for your loss. -Dimitri __________________ Friends don't let friends Plastidip

05-26-2013, 11:55 AM	#9
charged86 Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Drives: whiteout gt86 2015 IS350fsport Location: northern kentucky. cincy Posts: 1,931 Thanks: 2,154 Thanked 697 Times in 437 Posts Mentioned: 42 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	__________________ INSTAGRAM @Rcf_700 www.youtube.com/boostindub

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05-26-2013, 11:31 AM	#2
oofie Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Drives: FR-S Location: Dublin, CA Posts: 177 Thanks: 64 Thanked 41 Times in 31 Posts Mentioned: 8 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	sorry to hear...my condolences to you and your family

05-26-2013, 11:42 AM	#4
Mikem53 Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Drives: FR-S 6MT Location: Somewhere in Space Posts: 1,565 Thanks: 500 Thanked 882 Times in 433 Posts Mentioned: 5 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	My condolences.. Such is life.. Losing a loved one is very hard to deal with.. Death is a part of life.. Something we all face.. Sounds like he didn't suffer much.. And you should take some comfort in that.. Time will heal the hurt.. And your memories will keep him alive..

05-26-2013, 11:43 AM	#6
Barbarian Senior Member Join Date: May 2013 Drives: Raven FR-S Location: Nashville Posts: 110 Thanks: 20 Thanked 29 Times in 15 Posts Mentioned: 1 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	My condolences to you and your family.

05-26-2013, 11:48 AM	#8
FRiSson Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2012 Drives: FR-S MT Location: New England Posts: 1,081 Thanks: 118 Thanked 483 Times in 241 Posts Mentioned: 2 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	Sorry for your loss.

05-26-2013, 01:47 PM	#10
Sonolin Banned Join Date: Sep 2012 Drives: 2013 Scion FR-S Location: SoCal Posts: 885 Thanks: 1,489 Thanked 289 Times in 176 Posts Mentioned: 5 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	Sorry man. I can't imagine I haven't lost anybody so close to me yet. Best wishes.

05-26-2013, 02:31 PM	#13
root Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2012 Drives: Raven FR-S Location: Hawaii Posts: 268 Thanks: 4 Thanked 80 Times in 53 Posts Mentioned: 1 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	Hang in there man. I suddenly lost my mother to a stroke 3 years ago. It's rough, one moment everything is going on like a regular day, the next moment you're holding her in your arms realizing that woman who raised you feels so frail now and waiting the agonizing minutes for the ambulance. The one solace was that she did not suffer much, but it still seemed too soon, she was still very active, about same age as your dad. Lean on friends. It helped me a lot to have someone visit who wasn't part of family. Having someone who wasn't immediately close helped to break the tension and deafening emptiness and start to bring a feel of outside life and normalcy back.

05-26-2013, 02:46 PM	#14
suaveflooder Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2013 Drives: 2013 FR-S Location: San Diego Posts: 2,295 Thanks: 2,708 Thanked 1,052 Times in 664 Posts Mentioned: 29 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s)	We just lost my grandmother this week as well. It was a SUPER emotional week, but WOW the houses were all crazy! It was literally a 4 day party of laughter, tears and lots of drinking! This part of life sucks, but just as @Mikem53 pointed out, his legacy lives on in your life and those of your family! We got to see my grandmother's legacy all week in her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren! You would be AMAZED at all the stories we told! We all had manhattans (Grandmom's drink of choice), and I got to see family I haven't since I was young! It was EXACTLY how she would have planned it had she been alive! Take time off and allow yourself to greave and to celebrate all the things he did with his life! My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. I am truly sorry for your loss.

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