What is the Biggest Douchebag Car?

[OldSkoolToys]

Top Gear answered this question: its audi's.

[xrs]

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMf729n5avk"]Asian 350Z Bashing my FR-S/86 - YouTube[/ame]

Thought this was covered already?

[xrs]

Originally Posted by Coconuts

I dunno about "douchiest" , but I notice alot of Evo, STI and S2000 owners are pretty immature.

Hahah, around here most owners of those three cars are all in their 30's to 50's and baby them. Sti owners probably a hair more crazy but for the most part pretty civilized. Sorry but Mini Van drivers tops them all.

[Kimsey47]

I agree it isn't as much the car as the driver; however, I can say after living in the UK for 7 years I was able to see the transition that Top Gear refered to with the BMW's and Audi drivers... If you ever had someone riding your @$$ it usually had a BMW or Audi emblem... Or it was just a white Ford Transit van.

[Rayme]

Originally Posted by xrs

Thought this was covered already?

"You have a toyota I got a lexus is350 at home"

[IloveBaldEagles]

Any minivan with the Jesus fish!

[Lonewolf]

Now that this forum has realized it's not above such threads, I can repost something I wrote some time back.

Scientific Guide to Douche Bags of the Road

The Soccer Mom in the Oversized SUV (Lookatmenowus fatassius)

The weapon of choice for these rambunctious road hazards is usually a Hummer, Expedition, or Pathfinder. These past-their-prime attention whores can often be observed as they take up two parking spaces, double-park in front of a school, or blissfully scrape their two-ton death machines against unsuspecting parked cars, light poles, street signs, and miscellaneous roadside landmarks. Thankfully, their herds have been thinned out by ever-rising fuel prices. When confronted about her questionable driving and parking skills, this road delight often deflects the criticism, ignores you, denies her transgressions, or whips out her cell phone in an attempt to make you disappear. Beware the Asian and cell-phone dependent versions of this species, they are particularly oblivious drivers.

The Ricer (Insecureus tastelessius)

Truly the most colorful of the five categories of douche bags, they are often found in underpowered FWD imports, but they are occasionally seen in vehicles with legitimate performance credentials. The Ricer seeks attention by adorning his ride with eye-melting paint and graphic schemes, hilarious or boastful stickers, park-bench wings, "hella tite" sound systems, mismatched wheels and body panels, and obnoxiously loud exhaust set-ups. Ever the insecure type, the Ricer will race anyone or anything at a stop light (including people in minivans and people on mopeds). The Ricer often feels the need to prove his manhood by overtaking vehicles on the highway via dangerous speeds or with insanely stupid maneuvers, and then using his hazards to signify "victory." There is no accounting for taste or intelligence with this breed, and they often transcend racial or cultural stereotypes.

The Domestic Douche (Stolidus smallwangus)

A hairy-chested sight to behold, the Domestic Douche is no longer relegated to wearing gold chains and sporting mullets, for they may now be seen with sideways baseball caps, super cool sunglasses, earrings, and popped collars. Usually found piloting Mustangs and Camaros, the Domestic Douche has spread his reach to other types of vehicles, including lifted pickup trucks. The Domestic Douche often refuses to recognize the performance capabilities of foreign vehicles, and views people who buy imports as "Un'uhmerican." Membership in the Domestic Douche club is not complete until one procures a RWD vehicle with an aggressive exhaust tone, and then proceeds to do a burnout on a public road. Slick roads, skyrocketing insurance premiums, and CAFE standards are the natural enemies of the Domestic Douche.

The Badge Whore Douche (Ispenttoomuchus fruitus)

The most pretentious of the douches, the Badge Whore Douche will not be seen in a vehicle of a lesser stature than BMW, Mercedes, Audi, or Lexus. The alpha Badge Whore Douches drive Ferraris and Lamborghinis, and their level of douchiness is unsurpassed. Badge Whore Douches want everyone to know what type of car they drive or how much they spent on their car. They casually leave their keys strewn about with their oversized luxury key fobs on full display, and skillfully find a way to work into almost any type of conversation what type of vehicle they own. Ironically, these creatures are sometimes not as wealthy as they would like everyone to believe, and they often lease cars habitually while ringing up massive credit card debt, draining the equity from their home, and working two jobs to make their car payments. Perhaps not so surprisingly, Badge Whore Douches are attracted to the cheapest version of the 3 series BMW. These Badge Whore Douches are extremely dangerous on the road in light of the their questionable driving skill and their false sense of entitlement.

The Smug Douche (Annoyingus hypocrita)

This douche can be either a man or a woman, but their valiant steed of choice is often some type of hybrid, electric, or natural gas vehicle. Allegedly, their sole purpose is to save the planet, and they are sure to remind you of this fact on a daily basis. Most Smug Douches spend their days meandering about in car pool lanes or the number one lane on the freeway, and they relish the opportunity to keep other vehicles from traveling above the speed limit or passing them. When spooked, they often speed up to block your pass, tailgate you so closely that they could lick your bumper, or scuttle off like cockroaches into other lanes. There is a particularly fanatical sub-species of this douche known as the "Hyper-Miler," but their numbers are rather low. There has been some observed cross-breeding between the Badge Whore Douche and the Smug Douche, but more data needs to be collected before full-understanding of the phenomena is reached.

[JayNutter]

Originally Posted by Lonewolf

Now that this forum has realized it's not above such threads, I can repost something I wrote some time back.

Scientific Guide to Douche Bags of the Road

The Soccer Mom in the Oversized SUV (Lookatmenowus fatassius)

The weapon of choice for these rambunctious road hazards is usually a Hummer, Expedition, or Pathfinder. These past-their-prime attention whores can often be observed as they take up two parking spaces, double-park in front of a school, or blissfully scrape their two-ton death machines against unsuspecting parked cars, light poles, street signs, and miscellaneous roadside landmarks. Thankfully, their herds have been thinned out by ever-rising fuel prices. When confronted about her questionable driving and parking skills, this road delight often deflects the criticism, ignores you, denies her transgressions, or whips out her cell phone in an attempt to make you disappear. Beware the Asian and cell-phone dependent versions of this species, they are particularly oblivious drivers.

The Ricer (Insecureus tastelessius)

Truly the most colorful of the five categories of douche bags, they are often found in underpowered FWD imports, but they are occasionally seen in vehicles with legitimate performance credentials. The Ricer seeks attention by adorning his ride with eye-melting paint and graphic schemes, hilarious or boastful stickers, park-bench wings, "hella tite" sound systems, mismatched wheels and body panels, and obnoxiously loud exhaust set-ups. Ever the insecure type, the Ricer will race anyone or anything at a stop light (including people in minivans and people on mopeds). The Ricer often feels the need to prove his manhood by overtaking vehicles on the highway via dangerous speeds or with insanely stupid maneuvers, and then using his hazards to signify "victory." There is no accounting for taste or intelligence with this breed, and they often transcend racial or cultural stereotypes.

The Domestic Douche (Stolidus smallwangus)

A hairy-chested sight to behold, the Domestic Douche is no longer relegated to wearing gold chains and sporting mullets, for they may now be seen with sideways baseball caps, super cool sunglasses, earrings, and popped collars. Usually found piloting Mustangs and Camaros, the Domestic Douche has spread his reach to other types of vehicles, including lifted pickup trucks. The Domestic Douche often refuses to recognize the performance capabilities of foreign vehicles, and views people who buy imports as "Un'uhmerican." Membership in the Domestic Douche club is not complete until one procures a RWD vehicle with an aggressive exhaust tone, and then proceeds to do a burnout on a public road. Slick roads, skyrocketing insurance premiums, and CAFE standards are the natural enemies of the Domestic Douche.

The Badge Whore Douche (Ispenttoomuchus fruitus)

The most pretentious of the douches, the Badge Whore Douche will not be seen in a vehicle of a lesser stature than BMW, Mercedes, Audi, or Lexus. The alpha Badge Whore Douches drive Ferraris and Lamborghinis, and their level of douchiness is unsurpassed. Badge Whore Douches want everyone to know what type of car they drive or how much they spent on their car. They casually leave their keys strewn about with their oversized luxury key fobs on full display, and skillfully find a way to work into almost any type of conversation what type of vehicle they own. Ironically, these creatures are sometimes not as wealthy as they would like everyone to believe, and they often lease cars habitually while ringing up massive credit card debt, draining the equity from their home, and working two jobs to make their car payments. Perhaps not so surprisingly, Badge Whore Douches are attracted to the cheapest version of the 3 series BMW. These Badge Whore Douches are extremely dangerous on the road in light of the their questionable driving skill and their false sense of entitlement.

The Smug Douche (Annoyingus hypocrita)

This douche can be either a man or a woman, but their valiant steed of choice is often some type of hybrid, electric, or natural gas vehicle. Allegedly, their sole purpose is to save the planet, and they are sure to remind you of this fact on a daily basis. Most Smug Douches spend their days meandering about in car pool lanes or the number one lane on the freeway, and they relish the opportunity to keep other vehicles from traveling above the speed limit or passing them. When spooked, they often speed up to block your pass, tailgate you so closely that they could lick your bumper, or scuttle off like cockroaches into other lanes. There is a particularly fanatical sub-species of this douche known as the "Hyper-Miler," but their numbers are rather low. There has been some observed cross-breeding between the Badge Whore Douche and the Smug Douche, but more data needs to be collected before full-understanding of the phenomena is reached.

Dear God,

This is amazing.

Amen

:happy0180:

[Joeprelude]

Originally Posted by Fazzster

Worse yet they are plastered with Obama and Coexist stickers.

Im in the military and am not condoning this statement, yet i am also not saying it's wrong....

On the other hand, any car that is driven by anyone in my hometown (McKinney, Tx), any car driven by anyone named Chad, everyone on 75 and 635, and anyone from Tarrant County, Tx and every driver in Afghanistan and Iraq,

any car with Oklahoma Plates, Fans of the following Schools/Teams: New England Pats, Steelers, OU, Longhorns, Saints, LSU, Bama, Boston Red Sox, California Angels of anaheim in LA (or wtf ever you call them), Miami anything, Florida State, Oregon Ducks, Ohio State, New York Yankees, Green Bay Packers, anyone and anything from Houston, cars with California plates while they are in Texas, Louisiana Plates, Prii doin 90, Prii doing 40, Prii doing 10, Prii parked, Trucks that i can drive under, Hummer H2 and H3's Suburbans with a woman driving while 15 kids in the back, mini vans, RV's & RV trailers, cars bought by parents for kid that ungrateful, Left lane people doing 80 on 75 or 635, cars that look like cop cars but aren't cop cars, some but not all crotch rockets, anything Ford. People that use their blinker too much, people that don't use their blinker enough.

[GT86drifter]

Originally Posted by xrs

Thought this was covered already?

wow this makes me ashamed to be asian...

he clearly knows nothing

[Mo707]

1. is even between escalade's and BMW
2. Mercedes
3. Mustangs
From my personal experience!
My sister has a bmw and i have a few friends with mustangs. No one take this personally please!

[BlueLeader]

Anybody can be a douchebag in any car. Not to bash the OP but this kind of stuff creates some animosity between drivers. I'm pretty sure there's a thread somewhere in other forums stereotyping frs/brz/86 drivers. And I'm pretty sure some of us drive like douchebags too. The douchebags stem from the drivers not the car because any douchebag can be a douchebag in any car. How many times did I use douchebag?

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using Tapatalk 2

[tech4pdx]

Originally Posted by BlueLeader

Anybody can be a douchebag in any car. Not to bash the OP but this kind of stuff creates some animosity between drivers. I'm pretty sure there's a thread somewhere in other forums stereotyping frs/brz/86 drivers. And I'm pretty sure some of us drive like douchebags too. The douchebags stem from the drivers not the car because any douchebag can be a douchebag in any car. How many times did I use douchebag?

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using Tapatalk 2

Agree.

..and 6, 6 times. (:

[Bristecom]

Originally Posted by serialk11r

Man that guy needs to come to California. Over here, normal following distance is like maybe 1/5 of that. Maybe he'll stop on the highway with his car parked across multiple lanes and get out and yell at everyone too

Yeah, I was so happy driving in California because here, everyone pretty much drives by the book, half asleep - so if anyone is in a sports car going slightly over the speed limit or cornering sportily, they flip out. But in Cali, there were people flying past me and driving aggressively everywhere I went. I suddenly became the conservative driver and didn't have to worry about standing out.

What about the Hummer?

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21roxRBqRSI"]Family Guy: Hell Comes To Quahog "Who would drive a Hummer?" - YouTube[/ame]